See Sara Travel: Wellness Hotel- Bad Wildungen

I am really excited to finally start writing bout one of the things I have been wanting to write about for a long time, and that is my travels! Since I got to Germany in September, we haven’t been travelling very much. But we finally went on a 10 day vacation– which was very much needed, btw.

Our first stop was at the Göbels Hotel AquaVita Wellness Hotel in Bad Wildungen in Hessen, Germany.

THE HOTEL.

We arrived at around 2 pm in a small village in the middle of nowhere. The hotel on the outside was fairly average looking. But on the inside it was pretty nice.

The Hotel offers a sauna, 3 large pools (one of which is outside) a beauty lounge (which offers massages and manicures), a hair stylist, a fitness studio and a restaurant.

Unfortunately we weren’t able to book a massage, which we were really looking forward to, because we asked about it too late. Everything was booked up. TIP: if you are ever planning on going to a Wellness hotel, book a massage when you book the room. And try to book as early as possible so you aren’t dumb like we are and wait until you get there to ask about it.

THE ROOM.

We had booked the “deluxe” room, which apparently was the most expensive one they had, but it wasn’t the nicest room they had? That was weird. But it was still comfy. We had a lot of room which was nice and a little balcony with two chairs and a table. The bed was nice and soft and the blankets were warm… maybe a little too warm. But maybe that is just because I get hot really quick unlike most women.

On the bed laid two bathrobes which were as thick as bath towels but weren’t all too soft, but did their job. I am a fan of bath robes, so I was still excited to just have one.

The bathroom was nice. Was large. It also had a bidet, which neither of us used. But, it’s the thought that counts. It has two sinks and a shower/bathtub.

Upon check in, the staff told us that we would get a bottle of champagne delivered to our room. We would just have to call the front desk and they would deliver it to us. That evening we watched the Mummy and called for the bottle, I wasn’t expecting them to bring it into the room. I was in my pj’s and wasn’t exactly expecting company, but it wasn’t thaaat bad.

Overall: It was enough for what we needed. We would have liked a more asthetically pleasing room, but it was still a very comfy evening 🙂

THE POOL. 

But we weren’t there for the room, we were there for the POOL.

The pool area was seriously a dream. It was my favorite part of the whole experience! I could seriously lay on those beds for hours on end. The nice part was, although there were a lot of families, there weren’t that many people at the pool when we were there. I guess everyone else was there for some other reason. But we enjoyed the pool in private. There was also a jaccuzi. It wasn’t hot, but it was warm. Every 2 minutes or so, you had to press the buttons again for the bubbles. One of the pools was outside, which was nice when the sun was out, otherwise it was too cold. The water temp could have been a bit warmer, but it was still nice once you got moving around.

Overall: 10/10. Would go back in a heart beat!

THE FOOD.

The village the hotel was in had only a few restaurants. We decided to just eat at the hotel for dinner, which is fairly regret. There were only a few options. You could either pay 22€ for a dinner buffet (which is actually a pretty good deal to get an appetizer, salad, main course and dessert) or just order of the menu with only a few options. The buffet really didn’t have anything I wanted, so I stuck to the main menu. I just went for the Schnitzel and roasted potatoes, even though the brought me fries on accident. The fries weren’t very good, but everyone has their own preferences. The food was expensive and if I wouldn’t go back.

HOWEVER… part of our stay included the breakfast buffet. It was REAL good. There was an option for everyone. Yoghurt, cereal, fruit, bread, croissants, eggs and bacon, coffee and all kinds of juices. It was breakfast heaven and it cost us nothing. I would return for the breakfast.

FREE TIME.

In between watching TV, taking naps and swimming, we got some ice cream and took a walk in the village and a nearby park. The sun was shining and it was nice 🙂

OVERALL.

I don’t know if I would return for the hotel, unless I went for a massage. I would however go for the day just for the pools. Staying there is nice for one or two nights, but no longer than that. There really isn’t much to do in the town where it’s located. So unless you have yourself booked in the beauty lounge for the whole time and are comfortable with staying in your room for most of the time.

Would love to try out some more Wellness Hotels… have you been to one before? Where do you like to go?

Until next time,

xoxo Sara

 

Homesick.

Hi.

Funny sitting before the computer again and looking at a blank screen awaiting words.

This is sort of an update post, but more about my experiences with homesickness.

Since I arrived in Germany, I did not feel homesick once until just recently. I always said “Germany has always been my second home.” “Yeah, I miss my friends and family, but I love it here.” “I’ve toughed it out before, I can do it again.”

Well friends, here I am at the end of my toughing it out. Or should I really say the beginning.

I really didn’t miss home until now. The honeymoon stage of coming to Germany, being with my love again, beginning work, getting legally married, moving into a new apartment, the holidays and all of the other stuff are passed now. I sit here in my routine of a life– don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my life here!– and still feel like a piece of my heart is missing.

Being away from friends and family is hard enough with the “out of sight out of mind” concept. I was fine not hearing from people in the States often, because I had enough going on here to keep me occupied. But, those lack of conversations have added up and people are missing from me. Yes, long distance relationship/friendships are a two way street. I could have messaged people more often. Which is what I am trying to do now.

Something I have found to be interesting about my homesickness, is that when it hits, it hits. Someone could ask me what I want to do and the only things that pop up in my head are restaurants or places where I used to sit and read. And every place here in Germany that we could go to just wouldn’t suffice.

Homesickness for me is also closely tied to nostalgia and memories.

I miss home.

I miss Oregon and it’s chlorine water that costs nothing at restaurants.

I miss friendly strangers in supermarkets who allow me to go ahead of them in line because I only have a few items.

I miss sitting in my backyard in the springtime when I was younger on a Sunday afternoon seeing the cherry tree blossom it’s beautiful white flowers and doing cartwheels as I hear airplanes in the sky.

This memory leads me to wanting to go play golf with my dad at Langdon Farms and then eating chicken strips afterwards.

I miss going to Oswego Grill for happy hour. Or going to every McMenamins I could find.

I miss spontaneously driving around because I didn’t want to sit at home and no one was available so I would drive around and eventually end up at Target.

I miss cuddling with my dog Max and watching Gossip Girl on a Monday afternoon and slowly drifting into a little nap that would last until my Dad got home in the evening.

I miss my parents.

I miss my friends.

I miss my house.

I miss all of these things. And I am still trying to figure out what role this hole in my heart is turning me into. I know I am exactly where I need to be and that I do not regret the choices that got me to where I am now. I love my home and wish everyone could see it and experience this life with me.

But sometimes, it’s okay to miss home. Home is what got me here. I hope home misses me, too.

Until next time,

Sara ❤

2015.

I’m sure most of you have set some sort of goals for the year 2015. If you are one of those people that says “I don’t set resolutions because I don’t want to set myself up for failure,” well I hope you set goals for your life at least. And I wish all of you with goals that you meet them! Whether it takes this year, or the next five years!

Lady Tip: Us vs. Gentlemen

I have been wanting to write about this for awhile, and I am so excited to finally getting around to it. Since having a boyfriend, I have learned a LOT about relationships and boys; how boys tick and work. And BOY, who woulda thunk that there was also going to be a lot I had to learn about myself.

I had known ever since I met Micha that he has a servant’s heart. But I wasn’t expecting the different ways in which he would show it to me. When we would go shopping (or just anywhere in general), he would want to: hold all the clothes I would want to try on; carry all my bags; tell me to sit and wait in the car until he got out first to open my door; carry my coat to the car; or pull my chair back for me to sit down at a restaurant. Girls talk about these things a lot (especially those single ladies). We all want a guy who treats us like a princess and is what we call “a gentleman”. But I think that there are many girls, like myself, who think the term “princess” and these acts of services as things for girls who have “whipped” their boyfriends.

Let me take this time to explain that I have had to learn that by no means do these actions define Micha, or any man who does this, as being whipped. To be honest, when Micha first started doing these things for me, I was embarrassed. All I could think about was what other people were thinking. They probably thought that I was a prissy too-good girl who made my boyfriend hold my things. I also had this independent, feminist attitude about how I could carry my own things. I can open my own door. I had this urge to want to prove to him, to others and to myself that I could do all these things by myself.

But here’s the thing: He WANTED to do these things for me. If I didn’t let him, then he didn’t feel like he was showing his love to me. I had to learn that when we think chivalry is dead, maybe it’s because we don’t give men the opportunity to do these things. The actions of a gentleman should be more than him buying his lady a Starbucks Frappuchino and buying her roses. Although those things are nice, that’s not all we should allow a man t do. I am not saying that we should set high expectations, and if they don’t do these things then we should break up with them. This article is more just for the men who want to do these things and to the girlfriends to allow them to do it.

Let men be gentlemen. They want to. Normally.

Back To The Everyday.

I have been back for almost two days. It’s kind of weird. Okay, not kind of. It is weird. I hate this feeling where it seems like I was never actually in Germany. Or if I was, then it was only for a day or two. Crazy how fast three months can go by. It’s hard to just switch cultures in less than a day’s time. I have experienced mixed feelings about this whole transition. Let me share them with you.

On the way to the Frankfurt airport with Micha, we tried to make it seem as normal as possible. We listened to the same music we always do and we tried not to think about me leaving. But there was traffic because of an accident which made us worried on time. Then we almost died because people decided to start braking all of a sudden. Then it was impossible to figure out the airport parking. Then we couldn’t find where I check in my bags. Then there was a problem with paying for my second bag. Needless to say, we were pretty stressed. We had a solid 20 minutes to just sit together outside of security before I had to go to my gate. This was significantly less time than we had originally planned for. But, at least were together the whole time. The thing about stress, airports and I, is that we are not the best of friends. I always get a stomach ache and feel like throwing up. Throwing the feelings of sadness because of leaving my home for an unknown amount of time on top of that didn’t help at all. When the time came to say goodbye, neither of us were thinking when I scanned myself into the security line and realized that we didn’t hug before I was already through and couldn’t go back. It all happened so fast. I just focused on thinking that I was just coming back to Oregon as a vacation because I know I am going back.

My first flight from Frankfurt to Copenhagen wasn’t too bad. Normally those are the worst because I am leaving German soil. I didn’t even look out the window. I just sat and read my Harry Potter book and tried not to think about it. I tried to sleep. I normally can’t sleep on planes, but I was just emotionally, mentally and physically exhausted because I was also battling a cold. I got to Copenhagen and it was a fabulous little airport. It had a fancy mall on the inside of it. When I was heading to my gate though, I realized I left my boarding passes and passport on the counter of a little stand where I bought a snack and had a little panic attack. The lady there said she gave it to the people at the gate. So I got there and got my stuff back, then shortly after we boarded the next plane. The long 9 hour plane to Chicago. It felt like the longest flight of my life. It never ended. I hardly slept and was exhausted as we finally began to land in the States. I became very repulsed and disgusted by the sight of the States. I had realized just how German I had become in the past three months and being here made hightend my annoyance of being back. This annoyance is directed towards the fact that I felt that I was on the path and road to doing something that I was called to, and now it feels like a detour before I can go back. I don’t know why I am here yet, but that’s basically how I feel.

I was feeling sick and exhausted in Chicago and just wanted to get my last flight over with. I bought some cough medicine at a little store before I boarded my plane and as I walked to my gate, I realized I forgot it on the counter. As I went back, I told the lady it had been a long, rough day. It just seemed like a pile of things going wrong.

Finally, I got on the plane. We were a bit delayed, and although I was annoyed by this and just wanted to leave, I was more annoyed by the man sitting next to me. He was one of those guys who wanted to make it clear to everyone around him that he was annoyed by this delay and thought that verbally describing his feelings with curse words would solve the problem. I have a rough time with people like this. Sometimes I just want to slap them and say, “Bro, there is literally nothing anyone can do about this. Just chill and be patient. We will leave at some point.” Once we finally got going, I was able to doze off for a little bit, even though it was very uncomfortable.

When we landed in Portland, I was just so done. I didn’t want to be there (and I honestly still don’t). I was greeted by some friends and my parents and I just didn’t know how to act.  It was only three months. Didn’t feel like a very long time. Not long enough where I felt like I needed to cry by the sight of my family. That’s just me. But I just wanted to get my bags and leave.

Since being back, I have been in this weird “I want to get things done and make money so I can go back already” focused mood. I don’t really want to see a lot of people, because part of me wants to make it seem like I am still gone. I don’t want to feel embarrassed about being back, but I am because I have no idea what to do. I really don’t like the uncomfortable and unknown. I know this is where God does most of His work in us, but it is really frustrating not knowing what He is doing and what He has up His sleeve. I have a lot of options available to me for what I can do in order to go back. But, figuring out which one He has for me is my current process. It’s like I have a table with a bunch of different plates on it, and I am sitting there with Jesus and we are looking at all of them and I am waiting for Him to help me remove them one by one until there is one left and I know what my next steps are.

I had a job interview this morning. I am intrigued to see where that goes. My experience there formed a question in my mind that I have been wrestling with all day, that I will now bring to you and open up a conversation: Which is more important- the work environment or the pay? So for example, if you didn’t look forward to going to work everyday because the environment was miserable, but the pay and benefits were good, would you work there?

Sorry this is the most unorganized post I have ever written. There is no real theological point I am trying to make. I guess this is just for those who are curious about how I feel about being back so far. This is it. It’s difficult and I ask for patience with me and with my attitude towards being back. I am trying to talk with Jesus about it all and I’m sure things will get better as the days go on.

Please be praying for wisdom and guidance for me through this transition.

xoxo, Sara

How to Be Okay When His Plan Overrules Yours

I also wanted to title this “How To Be Okay When Your Plan Doesn’t Work Out”. But I thought the other one was more fitting.

I am not sure how to say this. I am a melting pot of emotions and feel just really weird. These past few weeks have been crazy emotional and stressful. I haven’t written anything to you in awhile because I wanted to wait to share this with you. As you know, I was having problems with my visa. As of today, it is official that I can not stay in Germany past the 19th because I have not been able to receive a visa to stay past the 90 days given visa-free. I am coming home, friends.

These past few months have been a battle of fighting to get a visa. We would go to the foreigner’s office to show them papers, then have them tell us, “No it won’t work, she doesn’t fit into this kind of visa.” So we would keep going back to try to apply for a different visa: a Freiwilliges Soziales Jahr (Volunteer Year), Student, Praktikum, Ausbildung (Internship). But they wouldn’t recognize the internship in any of these slots. I was not receiving enough money and was informed today that if I were to apply for a year’s visa, I would need all the money for that year up front and already in my bank account (roughly $10-20,000). They wouldn’t accept the fact that I was receiving money monthly from sponsors at home and the reason I wasn’t getting paid for working at the church was because I could live and eat by the Geiselharts. This made these past few months really weird and stressful for me because the time was getting closer and closer to the end of the 90 days. This past week, I knew in my heart that it was going to be a no. It was a little defeating. The final straw was when in one day, I received two letters: one from the foreigner’s office telling me that if we didn’t have any other ideas of a way to get a visa, then I would have to leave by the 19th; the second from my German health insurance which told me they could no longer insure me because they also didn’t recognize the internship. I also got an email that said that I had only received $50 from home (thank you, to those who sent it). This all came on one day and I realized that if those weren’t a sign that God was seriously closing these doors and fast, then I don’t know what a sign is. However, I still had a little hope. I thought, “Maybe this is an opportunity where Jesus wants to show me his sovereignty and strength where he shows me a miracle. I am at the lowest point where I can do literally nothing. All the power is in His hands and maybe He will miraculously turn things around!” Although those statements are true, it didn’t turn out as I would have hoped.

I didn’t get my visa because:

1. I didn’t pray enough.
2. I didn’t have enough faith.
3. I didn’t have enough hope.
4. I didn’t trust Him enough.
5. I did something wrong and now He is punishing me.
6. I was not walking in His will by being here.
7. This isn’t my call.

It can be SO easy to think and believe any one of these was the reason things didn’t work out. But, honestly, that is not the kind of God we serve (I am not going to go into the “Oh, you of little faith” discussion). I have an incredible and supernatural comforting peace about this. Yes, it’s hard and a little confusing because I don’t know what my next step is, BUT, I know Jesus is so intimately close to me through this transition and He is leading me somewhere else and I am so excited to see what else He has for me. But, thankfully I serve a God who is faithful and reminded me of my call, love and passion for Germany. He is a God who has a far better plan than I can currently see. He wants the best for me and will lead me to something incredible. He answered my main prayer this past week: Close the doors You want to close and open those You want to open. My prayers changed from “Help me get my visa” to “Your will be done”. And I think that’s exactly where He wants us. My time here was not a waste of time or money. I have been able to invest into some young people’s lives. Others have invested and poured so much into me and blessed me. I have learned so much more about the German culture. I have met so many new people (and therefore have new connections). And of course I found my Micha. This was definitely a part of God’s plan. Just the not being able to stay was not a part of mine.

What now.

1. Fly home. See you on the 18th.
2. Get a job and start making money to save up for my next step. Got any ideas? Connections? Help?
3. Find a car (goes with step 2).
4. Pray.
5. Wait.

I know my time in Germany is not over. It is just what that looks like is the question. It will be weird coming home after being sent out to basically live here. But let’s think of me coming home as an unexpected, extended and early visit home.

Because I know you will ask: “How is Micha doing with this? How are you guys?” We are surprised by the outcome. We are sad that we no longer have the opportunity to see each other every day any more. We will miss each other so unbelievably much. But we are planning on staying together. Distance doesn’t ruin relationship (ok sometimes it does), but I believe it strengthens it. We believe this time a part will be strengthening for the both of us. It will be a time to grow and truly seek what God has for both of us personally and as a couple. We are currently using up every spare moment we have together and enjoying the times where we can be together, because the day is QUICKLY approaching to when I can no longer hug him or see his pretty face. However, we are talking about visits. Hopefully you guys at home will have the chance to meet him soon. I cannot enter back into Germany until the 22nd of February. So hopefully he comes anytime between now and then. I think that if I don’t have my next step by then, I will come back for a while to visit.

Now I think I told you everything and answered any and all possible questions. If not, ask me in the comments and I will be sure to answer them.

I love you guys. Please continue to be praying for me and this new transition. I am just as in the dark about my future as you guys are. See you soon.

Sara ❤

Ooops. Update.

Well friends, I am still alive and well. I could do the whole “Sorry I haven’t posted anything in a while, I’ve been really busy” speech, but I don’t want to. I just haven’t gotten around to it, okay?!

What have I been doing: Well, the last time we spoke, I told you that I was having troubles with my visa. That is currently still an issue. We haven’t had time in the past few weeks to return to the foreigners office to turn in some different papers as a new option, but we are hoping to do that this week.

Also, I took a week of “vacation” where I went back home in Südlohn to visit my friends and families there. It was a wonderful time to see a decent handful of people again, but that also made it a little bit tiring and a little stressful. But it was definitely worth it. It was so weird to be back because it felt like a dream but also a bit of a nightmare? It was weird to be back to the place that radically changed me life for the better and worse, as a different person, and after two years since my last visit. Things had changed. There were new buildings, new houses, things were taken down, friends had new people in their lives, people changed. It’s funny, when I returned home from my exchange, I expected everyone to have changed just as I had. When I came home, I found everyone was the same and nothing had changed. When I returned to Südlohn, I was expecting everything to be the same, but a lot changed. It scared me a little. I felt weird and a little out of place. It was no longer the place I had in my memories. The place in my memories will remain only there… All my friends are growing up and moving on in their life, just like I am. So I shouldn’t have been disappointed, but I would be lying if I said I wasn’t. Nevertheless, it was nice to see the people I did get to see.

After coming back home, I got a boyfriend. I don’t want to use this post as the spot where I tell you all the story of how it all came to be, but maybe in another post if you can handle the cuteness and me bragging about him. Let me know. But basically, he is the reason I haven’t written in a while. We have been spending a lot of time together, and the past two weeks he worked in the mornings so we spent the afternoons/evenings together after I got off work. So… there’s your reason. (Yes, I am writing this blog post because he is working evenings this week. So what.)

This past weekend, the youth staff of our church took about 15 kids from ages 12-16 on a retreat in a cute, little village in the Black Forest. We learned about friendship: what a good friend is, Jesus is our friend, and it is important to have friendships. It was surprisingly not at all stressful or overwhelming as most retreats with youth that age are. They were a great group and we had a lot of fun. It was a great opportunity for me to get to know them better and them me. We played mini golf, soccer, some fun group games, capture the flag, and we worshipped Jesus together. Not a lot of time to sleep, but it was worth it.

Now, we here are starting, slowly but surely, to enter into the busy season known as October retreats and November conferences and December’s Christmas.

How I am doing: I feel… good. I really feel at home here and haven’t had much thought of homesickness. I think the fact that I know the language and culture already, and already know some people here has really made a difference. I don’t feel like a new kid anymore, and I have been more accepted into the church body and it is just cool. My English has decreased significantly, which is a good thing, but definitely annoying when people ask me what things mean or when I try to skype with someone; I always want to answer in German and even typing this, I think grammatically in German and can’t remember how to phrase things in English. On the flip side, my German is slowly but surely improving. That’s what matters, right?

How can you pray for me: Pray against homesickness. Along with the upcoming busy and Christmas season, comes stress and wanting old comforts which lie at home. Pray for strength for me through the season, as well. Pray for a growing relationship between my boyfriend, Micha, and myself. That we can be strengthened as a team and grow into the likeness of Christ together, pushing each other towards the goal that is Christ. Pray continually for my visa. Pray for a continued hunger and thirst for quiet time with Jesus. It has gotten a little too easy and comfortable now to not want to wake up a little earlier to chat with Jesus.

I love you all, and I want to apologize for my slow repsonses to texts, messages, or just not messaging any of you ever because I am the worst at that. I read everything, I promise, I just need to set aside time where I focus on you guys. Don’t be afraid to send me an email telling me how your life is going. This is my personal “How are you” message, to which all of you can reply to. I want to know things, too.

Also, let me know of any questions you have that you would like me to answer here. I have a few posts I am working on that I am hoping to get up within these next two weeks. Maybe one of them can be a Q&A. But you need to give me questions so I can answer them.

Until next time,

Sara ❤

It Is Well With Me

I don’t really know where to begin with telling you about the emotional roller coaster I have experienced since I’ve been here. Leaving as you know was terrible, but then I was excited to be back. Everything was new and exciting but a little overwhelming at times, but by the end of the day, things would usually settle down a bit and I would feel more at ease. And then… things got weird when someone asked me if I was homesick. I thought I had been fine and then once that question was asked, I knew that I was going to start missing home. Ever since Sunday (when the question was asked), I have been in this weird mood of “now that they mentioned home, now I feel homesick”. I have been noticing the littlest things that make me think of home and it just hurts. Like watching a Dad hug and kiss his daughter on the forehead, or a Mom rushing to her daughter’s aid because she feels sick. I do not have these simple luxuries anymore. Yes, people can try to fill those positions now that I am away from home, but there is no better feeling than feeling like a little kid again and having your parents there for you in those crappy times.

Add to that feelings of nervousness because I don’t know if I will be able to stay longer than three months because I might not be able to get a visa. Through that comes feelings of doubt. These past few days, my mind treats things as if I am only staying for three months, “Oh, doesn’t matter that I forgot that at home since I’ll be there soon anyway.” From that comes fear of actually staying because my mind has created this image of being able to go home and be comfortable once again.

However, here are my thoughts. They are a bit jumbled.

I don’t think you guys understand how embarrassing it would be to have to come back after three months to my home town, where my church community has prayed over me and sent me out. I made this trip to Germany out to be this HUGE move and… then I would have to be sent back? “Thanks for your support guys, but it didn’t really work out.” And, if I did go back, what would I do? Go to school? Get a job? Work another internship at a church? Move out? Stay at home? I have no idea. But it would be easier for me to do all those things than it is to do one of them here. But I would miss Germany and want to come here all the time. Is my calling really here? If it is, is it for now? Am I supposed to only be here for three months? If so, what lesson or point was achieved? Do I actually want to be here? Do I actually want to do this internship? Will I gain something new out of it or is it a waste of two years?

I do not have one single answer to any of these questions or thoughts. I sat in a kids room in the church today and cried and prayed (almost demanded) Jesus to come and meet me and talk to me and give me answers because I am at a loss here. “Jesus, what do you want me to do? Because I feel so lonely and lost right now and I know you’re there, but what am I doing?” I asked. There was silence. So I gathered myself together and went back to work. We then drove to the foreigners office once again to talk about another option and they said they will check to see if it would work in order to get a visa. I felt a little better after that. Then when I came home, I had the house to myself, which doesn’t happen often. I played a little worship music, and it was one of those times where you hear a song, that seams to speak all the right things in that moment.

My soul is now at peace and the only thing I have left to say is: “Jesus, through it all, my eyes are on You and it is well with me.” I will continue to follow Him whether that means I stay here, or if I go home. Through it all. 

Tell me about your times of doubt and fear and God’s faithfulness through it all.

xoxo Sara

See Sara Go To Bühl

I went, I flew, I came. I’m here. Well. I can’t even begin to describe to you how I am feeling and how things have been so far. If I had one word, it would be: Incredible.

I guess I will start by telling you what leaving was like. The worst. All I wanted to do was breakdown and cry (and I did in the bathroom of the airport). I tried to hold myself together as I said goodbye to Sami and Emily who were also there, and also to my parents who came to the gate with me. I wanted the goodbye to be quick and harmless, like ripping a band-aid off. But you know those times when something hurts, but you are with people and you say it’s fine, but you are just waiting until you can leave to go to your room and cry because it’s not fine? Well, that was basically how I felt. Once I got on my first plane to Seattle, I wrote down on my phone how I was feeling, as a way to vent. Here is what I wrote:

This Is My Calling.

7 days. That’s it. That’s all the time I have left here in Canby.

This summer has been quite the blur. I feel like I have nothing together, but I have also gotten so much done. I actually started packing today. I think today has been the first day in a while where I have felt more excited than scared. I feel a little bit more emotionally ready to go back to my other home and see familiar faces again. I am excited to see the German streets and little German cars. I am excited to eat Brötchen and authentic Döner once again. I am excited to hear the German language on a more daily basis, however terrified of that, too.

A question I have been getting a lot recently is: “What will be the biggest obstacle for you when you get there?”

Well, at first it will be the language. It has been two years since I was last in Germany and three years since I was there for an extended time (one year). Yes, I have had small opportunities to speak a little German here and there over the past two years, but not enough to remember everything. I was speaking to someone recently, and forgot the word “raspberry.” It’s the little things. However, the other obstacle I think will be the biggest one, and most obvious, is missing home and the comforts that are here in Oregon. Which is understandable and I suspect there will be nights where I cry for a long time because living in the uncomfortable is just hard.

Now, I won’t let those things stop me from accepting the call I have received. That will be the thing I will remind myself all the time. This is my calling.

Please continue to be praying for me; for emotional stability, the process of getting there and everything I need goes smoothly, for holistic health. I love all of you. Thank you for your support.

❤ Sara